LIFE! (The Email Version)

I must tell you all I have spent the better part of this week being stalked. Yes, I said stalked. It all started when I had to talk to a man about getting a project done for work. I had been warned that he was a little different, but I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into. First, he called me 15 times at work. Everyone tapes messages to my door and when I walked up my door appeared to be a paper mâché project. This is only the start of it.


So I called him and he seemed nervous but I told him what I needed to order and he said he would email me an invoice. Mistake #1 was calling him back on my cell phone, which he proceeded to call 3 times in a row to inform me I gave him the wrong email address. Because apparently it's my fault he thought Floyd is spelled "Sloyd."

I was then called again and he said "Well......"

"Well what?"

"Well did you get my invoice I just sent you?"

WELL, sir, we literally just got off the phone and I have not had time to check my email as you are acting like this is an emergency. (I didn't really say that, but it was in my thoughts.)

He then proceeded to tell me to get a check for the full amount and take it to his bank and deposit it. By this point, I was completely confused. Never has a complete stranger asked me to take a check to the bank for him. He then started giving me all of his checking account information along with a power of attorney.

Ok, maybe not the power of attorney, but seriously gave me all the checking AND savings information. By this point, I just told him I would call him when I had a check ready. Fast forward maybe 4 minutes later and I have an email titled "LIFE!" It said, "Maybe I am asking too much of you. I will come get the check myself so you don't have to deposit it for me."

I was too exhausted to deal with him anymore at this point and told our office manager to just get me a check whenever it was convenient for her considering I knew how much she had going on this week and the rest of the month with it being the end of the year.

And since then I have received approximately 14 calls, voicemails, emails, and calls to work. A sweet girl from the ad agency we work with text me to say he even called them looking for me. The funny part is I am not even ignoring him. He is simply that anxious to get a check for work he hasn't even done yet and had to expend any energy working for yet....I take that back he has expended a lot of energy, but simply in his stalking. He is probably sitting outside of my window right now and has probably researched me enough to be reading this post.


Just saying if anyone is looking for Fanny Pack Mom, I will be on the down low until I have that check in the bank for him.